Denver’s gay pride parade is heading from Cheesman Park down Colfax Avenue to the Civic Center today. But, honestly, I think the whole event is heading in the wrong direction.
Don’t get me wrong. I am, and have been all my life, a supporter of the gay rights movement. As a gay man, how could I not be? I fully support the movement’s belief that we all have the right to live free from government interference and organized social oppression. But one of the greatest tools of the movement, pride marches (and maybe even the movement itself) have been hijacked by the “sex” in sexual orientation.
Originally, the intent of the gay civil rights movement was pretty simple: It was wrong to be treated any differently than the rest of the citizenry because one was different – be it skin color, religious choice, or sexual orientation.
But over the years, that simplicity has grown complex, through a loving yet misguided attempt at non-judgmental inclusion. As a result, the current “community” is now a growing cluster of people with virtually nothing in common other than being part of a sexual minority.
I can understand the movement’s focus on sex issues in the early days, as the most pressing concern facing the community at the time were anti-sodomy laws. The lives of thousands of gay men and women were destroyed by the abuse of these laws. But we are in a very different place today. According to FreedomToMarry.org, there are no states where gay sex is illegal, but 43 states where gay marriage is banned.
Nothing reflects this growing transformation of the gay rights movement into the sexual minority movement than the use of acronyms to describe this group. What once was known simply as the gay community became the lesbian and gay community, followed by the addition of the bisexual community and then the transsexual community. Obviously too long a term to say, it quickly became an acronym, the LGBT community. Yet, the trend of inclusion continues, as some call for adding those who are questioning and unsure or, as we would say, the LGBTQU community. Is there no end?
The magazine Anything That Moves went so far as to call for the term FABGLITTER to stand for the Fetish, Allies, Bisexual, Gay, Lesbian, Intersexed, Transgender, Transsexual, Engendering Revolution.
At the risk of being considered politically incorrect: Enough, already.
Reflecting the growing dilution of the gay rights movement in the name of diversity, Denver’s PrideFest, of which the gay pride parade is a part, and the other pride marches across the country have followed the trend and have lost their ability to educate the public about the general gay community. PrideFest now is part protest, part parade, part political theater, part circuit party, and part street fair. In other words, in its attempt to meet the needs of such a diverse community, it tries to be everything to everyone. Sadly, as a result, it has become nothing to anyone, except the sexual fringe communities. The gay men and women I know stay away from PrideFest, not out of discomfort for being gay, but because current PrideFest participants are not reflective of them or their values.
There have been attempts to change the path of gay pride. In 1984, I was director of the Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Colorado. My staff and I asked the question “What is our intended message?” It was a time when the gay community was being decimated by the growing number of AIDS deaths. We suggested a mourners march, complete with black clothes, a single drummer, a bagpiper, something to show the city we were hurting, grieving, dying daily. Community organizers and businesspeople rejected the idea. “What fun would that be? Besides, what would the drag queens wear?”
So today, we have a sexy party instead of a political statement. Yet, the sexual concerns of the early gay movement have been met. What is lost in all the glitter, feathers and leather harnesses of PrideFest is the power to move the public to better understand gay men and women. The sexual revolution is over, yet PrideFest lingers in that adolescent sexual environment of the ’70s and ’80s. Frankly, those sexual displays at PrideFest tend to do more damage than good.
Gay women and men in Colorado face discrimination every day, in employment, in housing, in public accommodation, and in legal recognition of our relationships. So why all the focus on sexual inclusion?
The gay community must put away the whips and gowns and get serious about the powerful impact PrideFest can have on our futures. It’s time to disengage from the fringe sexual communities and instead focus on the real needs of gay men and women in Colorado. It’s time to discourage the overt sexual displays of the poly-amorous, the drag queens, and the fetish communities. If and when it becomes illegal to be bisexual or to dress as a woman, I’ll join that protest parade. But for now, it is essential that our PrideFest message be strong, simple, and about one community with one issue: the equality of gay men and women.
Keith W. Swain is a Denver psychotherapist in private practice and can be reached at drkswain@mac.com.)
