Hazbin Hotel hasn't even officially released its first episode, but the online, adult animation already has plenty of memorable lines from just its pilot. Why wouldn't it? From Vivienne Medrano, the talented artist behind the drawings and animations on the YouTube channel, Vivziepop, Hazbin Hotel portrays all of the quirky, ambitious, and dark humor that Vivienne has become synonymous with.
With a project that's been years in the making, Hazbin Hotel came into the world with plenty of character and history built in which suited some of the fastest, wittiest, and raunchiest dialogue ever seen in independent animation.
10 "I'm Alive!"
Starting things off on the right foot, a humble demon welcomes the series on the wrong one. As Hell's yearly clock resets, a small, blue demon falls from the sky, either as a victim of another one of the hellscape's endless rampages or as a new arrival to it. Despite his fragile disposition and huge fall, the little demon actually survives the fall with little to no ailments.
As anyone would do in that situation, he quickly cheers, "I'm alive! I'm alive!" before quickly getting run over by a car. At the time, his words were accurate but not sustainable, but those are just the breaks in Hell.
9 "So Many Orphans..."
While Charlie is early the star of the show, it's hard to compare her to a person who, in more ways than one, steals the screen with just a look. That would be none other than Alastor, aka the Radio Demon. A legendary miscreant and overall bad guy, he surprisingly stops by the Hazbin Hotel to offer his assistance, seemingly out of pure boredom.
He decides to join Charlie's team after witnessing her musical number on the news show, admitting, "Why! I haven't been that entertained since the Stock Market Crash of 1929!" Alastor continues to laugh, as he punctuates with, "So many orphans..." This is dark humor at its quietest and best.
8 "Well, I Heard You Loud And Clear!"
Even though Alastor is famous as a demon beyond evil itself, he quickly became famous among the community as the guy telling dad jokes. As soon as he steps through the Hazbin Hotel's doors, nearly every line that leaks out of his mouth is some sort of quiet dad joke.
When Vaggie starts interrogating Alastor, she's surprised to hear that he wants to help, making Alastor question whether or not the two ladies understand him. He begins testing the mic stand that he carries around, and the mic surprisingly responds, "Well, I heard you loud and clear!"
7 "The Highlighted Parts Are The Best Bits!"
Hell may be full of all manner of ghouls, demons, and bullies, but it is oddly the birthplace of one of the most cheerful and elegantly voiced characters in all of animation, Charlie Magne. Charlie, the daughter of the leading demon, Lucifer Magne, is trying to reform Hell and recently got a spot to promote her new venture on Hell's #1 News Show.
Despite Charlie's ambitions, she can't quite assuage the tensions of her girlfriend, Vaggie. In her efforts, she shows Vaggie her script proclaiming, "The highlighted parts are the best bits!" Vaggie, in her dismay, can only murmur, "Uh...It's all highlighted."
6 "My Drugs!"
Angel Dust's introduction does a great job of presenting his character as well as opening a few doors for any tepid viewers that may want to leave. After a successful business transaction with a local family man, Angel Dust decides to celebrate with their namesake.
He goes to a nearby vending machine to make his purchase only to have his treat to himself immediately stolen by a thief. Fortunately for him, the thief is immediately crushed by some debris. Unfortunately for him, his drugs get destroyed in the process. In a great example of moral priorities, Angel Dust looks at the wreckage and screams, "My Drugs!"
5 "Eh, You Win Some, You Lose A Few Hundred."
Clearly, no one has more tact and self-awareness than Angel Dust. As Charlie's first resident of the Hazbin Hotel, he was meant to be a glimmering example of how people can change. However, change doesn't really happen in the pilot, and he quickly reverts back to his old deeds, right in the middle of Charlie's interview.
After Charlie and Vaggie pick him up after he helps launch a turf war, they begin questioning his intentions. Angel Dust can only try and ease down the situation and calmly states, "Eh, you win some, you lose a few hundred." He doesn't really make a case for himself.
4 "Traffic Is 'Hella' Backed Up."
While the person running the news ticker may have not had any audible lines, they made their personality and voice clear in the pilot. If one pays attention to the ticker at the bottom of the news broadcast, they'll find some of the most hilarious lines in the pilot and a lot of sharing for one, disillusioned guy.
It starts out innocent enough, as they simply explain their "Traffic is 'hella' backed up" joke, but it slowly breaks down when they begin overexplaining, start discussing troubles with their, describe cheating on their wife, and reliving one bad day at the zoo. The pilot for Hazbin Hotel could've literally just been this for half an hour, and no one would complain.
3 "No, No, No, Babe. Jokes Are Funny. I Made You Look...Sad And Pathetic!"
Angel Dust doesn't know what apologies are; but for a resident of Hell, that's probably to be expected. As Vaggie begins berating him for his actions in the turf war, she claims that he made them look like a joke.
As a funny character from a cartoon, Angel Dust knows a thing or two about jokes and defends the situation with a clear dichotomy, as he states, "No, no, no, babe. Jokes are funny. I made you look...uh...sad and pathetic! Like an orphan with no arms... or legs. Uh...oh, with progeria! Great, now I'm bummed thinking about it." While a sick orphan isn't funny, Angel Dust trying to compare one to Charlie and Vaggie kind of is.
2 "You Think You Can Buy Me With A Wink And Some Cheap Booze!"
As part of Alastor's efforts to help with the hotel, he drags in a few favors to help fix up the establishment. He first calls in a little maid by the name of Nifty, who quickly begin tidying up the entire establishment. The next one he calls is the small, adorable, and destructively impulsive Husker who Alastor nabs in the middle of a bad hand at poker.
Already having a history with Alastor, Husker initially refuses to help with the hotel, that is until Alastor gently gestures to a bottle of liquor. Husker can only shamefully remark, "You think you can buy me with a wink and some cheap booze! Well, you can!" And that's how Husker becomes part of the Hazbin Hotel.
1 Everything In Angel Dust And Sir Pentious' Back-And-Forth
Angel Dust just came out of the gate with puns and innuendos galore, certainly too many and too crude to put here. However, everything about him deserves some credit for its contribution to this pilot's amazing script. And there's no better example of his snappy comebacks and perversions than in his heated exchange with Sir Pentious.
As the two battle it out on the streets of Hell, Sir Pentious unwittingly opens up line after line that's just ready for Angel Dust to respond with a joke. Things get so ridiculous that Angel Dust just deconstructs the entire situation when he admits, "You know, you really gotta watch what comes outta your mouth. I've been making these jokes the whole time!"
