Incredibly, Adam would not believe me! By the time my oldest son was sixteen he had gone on many farm calls. Dehorning, delivering calves, rectal exams and treating sick cows were all part of his childhood memories. He was always instructed to mind his barn manners and assist me as needed, i.e. holding nose tongs or cranking the calf puller. Whenever we drove through the countryside, I would educate or quiz him on breeds, type, and age of cattle.
But one day while driving by the Clemedow Dairy Farm, sixteen-year-old Adam casually mentioned that some of his high school friends had gone cow-tipping.
“Adam,” I blurted out, “There is no such thing as cow-tipping!”
“But, Dad, my friends said that you can sneak up on them at night when they are sleeping and push them over.”
“Adam,” I reasoned, “When did you ever go on a farm call with me and see a cow that you thought that you could walk up to and push over?”
But all my logic failed to convince him. The entire incident was forgotten until Adam was about twenty-five years old and sent me this URL: www.timesonline.co.uk/printfriendly/0,,1-2-1858146-2,00 (cow-tipping myth hasn’t got a leg to stand on – Britain-Times Online) Adam wrote, “Wow, Dad, you were right!” Mark Twain once observed that as teenagers grow up they begin to see the “old man” as smarter.
When I was asked to speak to a high school class I decided to make copies of this cow-tipping myth article for the students. After my presentation on the myth of cow-tipping, one young lady in the back of the room asked, “Are you sure?” Then she gave the names of the two boys who claimed to have tipped cows.
Dr. Margo Lillie at the University of British Columbia and her student Tracy Boechlen did a wonderful analysis of the physics of cow-tipping. They concluded that it would take 2.07 people to tip a static cow, with the caveat that it would not resist or move!
As a veterinarian, there were times when I needed to drop a cow to the ground for the purpose of rolling the cow to correct a twisted uterus (usually counter-clockwise) or a displaced stomach (abomasum-LDA—as in counter-clockwise position). Most of the time this did help the cows. In order to drop, or “cast,” a cow, I would administer an intravenous sedative in the tail vein then use a lariat to squeeze a cow down.
Google “cow-tipping myths” to find many interesting articles, and even You Tube videos.
Florida news reporter Eddie Glenn did a very good article on “Cow-tipping: Myth or Reality.” <tahlequahdailypress.com/features/local_story_349092342.html> Tahlequah large animal veterinarian Bill Elliott perhaps didn’t take Glenn’s research very seriously.
“We can’t vouch for the accuracy of the following quotes from Elliott: ‘Cow-tipping? Yeah, we’ve gone out and found entire herds on their sides,’ he said. ‘We try to put them back upright, pointing toward the North Star if it’s nighttime, and toward the east during the day, so they can find their bearings. There are always empty beer cans around, but we can’t tell if they’ve been consumed by the cows or the people who tipped them.’”
And so, the urban legend lives on!
Word of caution—don’t go into a pasture where cows have calves with them or if a bull is present as this could be very dangerous. Also, farmers are now very concerned about biosecurity so that no diseases are introduced to their cattle.
I drive a team of oxen at the Orange County Fairgrounds. The oxen are half-brothers, seven years old. They are from a rare breed called Lineback cattle. Each animal weighs about 3,000 pounds. I verify their weight annually on a scale certified by the Orange County, California weights and measures. These guys stand almost six feet tall at the withers. They feel safe with me and have a flight zone of zero with me. However, if a stranger approached them they would keep their distance. In a field, even if they were sleeping, they would rise and walk away. They would smell you coming when you are a half mile away; they can walk as fast as a man can run. They run almost as fast as a horse. If they were standing and allowed you to approach them, they still would not allow a stranger to touch them. If you cornered them, they would turn their horns toward you. Do not attempt to “tip” my cows, you will never succeed and the closer you get to them, the more danger you will face. If you are lucky, they will just run away. Visitors often ask me about cow tipping, I tell them it is certainly an urban ledgend. Cows are not stupid. They will not permit mere humans to tip them. Of course, maybe they tipped a six month old calf, and thought it was a cow. Try tipping a 3,000 ox. You would have more success tipping a Volkswagon.